I’m not even shopping
yet the ADs still find me.
A simple game or video to watch
and boom, they pop up.
I could always pay to make them go away
but that is even worse.
All the money that would go to the items I could have purchased
now go to them anyways without even getting anything in return.
Oh you sneaky sneaky internet commercials.
I hate you!
I am eating.
I’m just not eating enough.
Come the evening I decline to have supper.
I barely have breakfast.
Mostly coffee.
Maybe something for lunch.
But even though the stomach growls
It is ignored and I refuse to come downstairs
to eat or drink.
My choices baffle me.
I wonder if this mental health crisis
is affecting me deeper than I thought?
Is this a sign my depression is once again getting worse?
I don’t know but for now the kitchen is out of bounds.
Meaningful goobley gook
or nonsense spewed randomly?
Habits change
but discipline remains.
Is my choice a valid one
or am I merely playing a part
once again?
What they say
can be profound.
They talk with their eyes,
their tails
and
their purrs.
They talk with sounds
that we think are cute
but actually
they mean something.
Cats only use their vocals
when they know the humans are listening!
Staring at me.
Waiting for me.
Wanting me to do something.
Play with her?
Feed her?
Pet her?
Expressive eyes looking straight into my soul.
I really wish I could ask her what her purrs mean
As she looks at me like that.
Silly singing songs
Chair dancing
Playing the board game
Laughing because it feels good
Just like the song says it would
Be of good cheer
Or cry to your hearts content
Both reasonable options
And both desperately needed
Simultaneously induced
Means laughter between each sob
Unexpected.
Like always.
Prevention options?
Could they have been prevented?
The horror of it happening
feels like it is for someone else.
It comes home personally
when it affects
your plans for the weekend.
Selfish.
Yes.
Human reaction?
Yes.
Survivable?
Yes.
Funny?
No.
Appointments set up.
Appointments met.
Appointments to help.
Others that highlight the stress.
Scheduling down time
comes at the expense of time.
So crying begins between appointments.
A bolt of electrical energy
Satisfying to watch
Hits a target unexpectedly
Who’s the victim here?
Given the nature of the strike
We all find ways
To bring back the deadly vision
Beauty in the terrifying spectacle
Saturn's Premier Poet 