Spare

Back up plans are good to have.

Things sometimes go wrong.

Like you have a second get away car.

Or extra batteries for your night time activities.

But children are never dispensable

and it is a mindset

I truly do not like.

So I will continue to love

and teach my children

all the necessary skills they may need.

Line of Defense

Never tell an enemy

what protections you have in place.

They will figure them out

eventually,

but until they do

you have a little more time

being safe.

Enemies know how to pierce through

the toughest security measures

no matter how many walls you build.

The worst ones

are those who know how to get through

your emotional ones.

The abuse they wreak

will leave you traumatized

for years.

Drop Out

What do you do

when your child

is a drop out?

Do you encourage them

to be whatever they want to be?

Do you express

your disappointment and anger?

Do you succumb

to the despair of being a failed parent?

Or do you try to continue

to figure out the best things

for both of you?

Getting Help

If you need anything

Just let me know, OK?

Is there some way I can help you?

Don’t be afraid to call if something comes up!!

I have learned the hard way

that asking for help

is not a sin.

I should not feel guilty

because I have problems.

Yet, so many people

don’t understand,

asking for help

is not a simple thing to do.

Cultural and social norms

put pressure on everyone

to be able to go it alone!

If you can’t do this one thing

then how do you expect to follow through?

Even my mother told me

“If no one else is doing it, then just do it yourself! I did it!”

Except I am not her.

I have problems because of her advice

and now even though I understand why

it still hurts to realize

she will never understand why

I can not just do it!

Whether it is a simple chore

or finding a job

or looking after my kids.

Years of coping strategies

that were more detrimental than helpful

have taken their toll.

Only now,

do I know how to use my voice

and ask for the help

I sometimes need!