What’s wrong with you!
Stop being lazy!
Just get up and go do it!
What are you waiting for?
How come you’re not working?!
….
I am working.
I know what is wrong with me.
I am not lazy.
I can not just get up and do it.
I’m not waiting, I’m healing.
…
Yet never is it enough.
Unless my work is what they think I should be.
It is never enough to be strong mentally.
It is never a choice between being healthy physically
or shut down because of mental trauma.
…
They do not realize they have traumatized me.
They do not understand.
They care about my future
but miss what is happening in the present.
In order to heal, I must come to terms with my past
…
I fight with them because they do not see me.
I argue in order to prove I am right.
I know I can not change them.
Yet, I still try.
Perhaps someday I will learn to love myself.
With or without them.
